Thursday, June 28, 2012

ciao italia!

Somehow, somewhere, some people, "conspired" to have this happen...

Made these for a few people of whom I will share this adventure...  experience of which I would have everything to gain.
I hoped for this time away to give me much insight and "clarity".  What I learn instead is to sometimes expect the unexpected, great things happen when you least expect, and are sometimes unplanned.  I go with an open mind, and allow this experience to actualize to what it's all meant to be...

Wednesday, June 27, 2012


There are rare individuals we meet, a connection and bond is formed, seemingly unlikely and inexplicable in certain ways, but makes an impression despite time and distance.  One such person is someone I met some years ago, pretty far in distance, mountain time zone, most beautiful and loving soul, empathic, compassionate wife, doting mother of some very lucky boys, and a "rainbow" little girl.  She is a woman with strong convictions, but never forceful, only respectful.  She has such an understanding of the human psyche, highly intellectual, and the most beautiful writer, with much honesty and truth, much prose, and a way with words that is so touching.  I can't relate to her tremendous losses, but I find comfort by the power of her words, her truth.  I feel the intensity of her words, her heart.   We were only in each other's company for about two weeks, and I have lost the bond connecting me to the periodic and personal updates.  It is only through social media, of which I rarely partake, that I am kept abreast of her happenings.  She may not know it, but is a person I draw strength.

My intentions were to have the "gifts" in her possession by Earth Day, because I know the significance of that day to her.  But, the procrastinator in me said by Mother's Day which turned into Memorial Day, because it would mean remembering two special souls, then into as soon as I can is better than not at all.  Nonetheless, they are finished, and shall soon be sent.
"un" dressed bunny, by Barbara Prime

well-dressed bunny with her "rainbow" pinafore

back, gathered a crocheted chain for the tail

watching over

two special souls

Though she will receive these momentos a little later than I had hoped, the sentiments are most sincere.  I hope Ali V likes her bunny, and a key ring for her mom to keep close...  If I should ever to be in that role, I only hope to be a fraction of the "mom" that she is!

Tuesday, May 22, 2012

post BOS, philanthropic pursuits...

Anxiety, sleep deprivation, hesitancy...with BOS over, almost a month now, I am finally getting around to writing about it.  In hindsight, I am glad that I participated.  The positive feedback and practical strangers acknowledging and telling me that they like my work was nice reinforcement, makes me feel legitimate.  Everything leading up to it, and everything I managed to accomplish for it was all a step in the right direction.  Not only did it give me direction, but provided the motivation for me to create.  I only hope to perpetuate this momentum somehow.  Ironically enough,  even from the perspective of an anxious introvert, one of the biggest gains was talking to, and meeting all the wonderful and talented people.  I was in a room with 5 other immensely talented individuals.
Chris Sanders

Ed Vermehren

Jackie Shrzynski
Barbara Hanson
Amy C. Wilson

the space
I love supporting local art.  If only I had a larger disposable budget!  My acquisitions included the following,
Kathleen Andersen, glass terrarium pendant light
art by Margot Kingon

Kokma Toys by Amy C. Wilson

pillow by Barbara Hanson, anything with architecture and windows, need i say more!

limited edition AAARRRRRTT! shirts by Chris Sanders
Most importantly, it was the philanthropic efforts of a very special 4 year old, Leila, that stole my heart.

A humble suggestion and modest effort on my part, her delectable chocolate chip cookies, and the generous donations of the people filtering through that weekend, a very respectable total was raised for her cause.
Leila with her chocolate chip cookies, young lady with an enormous generous heart!
 My baking contributions
madeleines by David Lebovitz, sans glaze
It helped that we had a spread of treats contributed by the participating artists!

There are new adventures on the horizon!  Sometimes when you allow things to just happen, they turn out better than what you plan.  I do not consider myself a "spiritual" person.  If a roller coaster of emotions is the price to pay for a favorable outcome, then this is a small price.  It has to be an "energy" beyond myself, maybe it's an accumulation of my karmic energy rewarding me despite questioning how I could be so deserving.  Perhaps, understanding individuals with the power to grant me the time...mystical or not, or both, I am grateful.  A very wise friend shared with me today that everything works out as they should when we are not attached to the outcome!

Thursday, April 19, 2012

breathing in the air

Confronted with a strong visceral, intense hostility, and aversion, the word that comes to mind is "hate".  I'm not proud to be harboring this emotion for anything, not only because it's not the core of who I am, but the intensity of this "dislike" is wasted on something not worthy of even an inkling of time.  I understand the rationale, but reacting only grants it credence.  There are encounters of which I cannot control, I hate that this "chance" was enabled by an individual of which I had "once" been afflicted with the opposite emotion.  Naturally, exposure develops desensitization.  Though I hope to never have this opportunity, my best response would be one of indifference.

Otherwise, my window is finished!
with hand fabricated chain, closure with its final incarnation

my window open
the hand drawn view

that little door knocker, works!
on display @ Hudson Beach GlassBOS group show

Life is full of lessons.  When I can open my eyes and heart to it, windows open.  I've unlocked a door.  I can feel the fresh air and am "breathing" it in.  I'm not only saying and hoping, but actually believing that I will be okay again, maybe, even better than what I was!

Tuesday, March 27, 2012

starts with a decision

Everything emanates from a decision.  It was nice to feel the wind whipping as I ran, jogged, walked at a brisk pace, on the track again after many months of a sedentary lifestyle.  After numerous excuses, and as much as I'd didn't want to do it, I did make the decision, now the work begins with keeping it.  I don't know why I was foolish to expect anything less of myself than to reflect on what that track has been in the past.  The road may be very familiar and similar, but the journey won't be the same.
door & key, components in the making for a bigger piece

The key is in my hand, unless I make the decision to unlock the door and walk through, I may never know what's on the other side.  This seems like a bunch of cliches, but these trite sayings are truisms I can apply to myself.

Saturday, March 10, 2012

a window opens

Eons ago, a semester was spent abroad in Siena, Italy.  For the drawing class, equipped with sketch pad and ink pen, a field trip was sometimes taken to the rolling hills of the Tuscan countryside, to just sit and draw, and soak in the landscape.  Numerous hours were spent at the campo, duomo, or one of the many alleyways, to sit, draw, people watch, and take in the astounding architecture packed in every square inch of the cityscape.
for sense of scale, right measures 3"x5.5"

4"x 3"; 1.5"x2"

bottom is 5.5"x3.5"

no bigger than 3"x4.5"

These small scale vignettes of it's culture and landscapes are some of my favorite souvenirs from that experience.  Though I lack "artistic ability" in certain ways, detailed drawings of architecture was something I had always intended to continue, but too many other things always had priority.  When I considered submitting something for The Big Draw,  I looked to my environment and started taking notice of the beautiful architecture that surrounds me.

Of course, these drawings didn't happen for me given the timing of events.  It was volunteering at this event, that I was lucky enough to acquire this painting by a local artist.
6"x12" of Homespun
Ed Vermehren, one of the participants of the live rally drawing.  I love his vibrant use of color in the depiction of this building, Homespun Foods, local eatery.  It is ironic that the very thing I fear, color, was one of the elements that drew me in.  I know nothing about color theory.  My humble little drawings are black and white.  And it is only recent, that color permeates my jewelry in the form of enamels.  I was staring at this painting on my wall, when something finally clicked and everything fell into place.  I now have an idea and concept, and hopefully to execute into a finished piece for the group show for BOS..  This quote has been festering for quite some time, with no clear idea of realizing it in a tangible way, "when one door closes, a window opens-  Alexander  G. Bell".  I can finally connect the dots, and incorporate my most recent intentions in a real and productive way.

Construct a window,

hinged on a box,
opens to the inside with a hand etched , scene on the back panel

...the possibilities are infinite, already have many ideas and options of expanding and developing this idea... I'm excited about the concept of the "inside", opening the window to look "outside" into the scene that is contained "in a box", metaphors abound! I've only initiated the process of this idea, and some of the photos are a rough mock-up, but I am excited to execute and see it to fruition.  Is it too indulgent to be this excited about my own idea?

Friday, February 24, 2012

gift(s) to self

It has been echoed my way on more than one occasion that "forgiveness is a gift you give to yourself".  I'd started reading Unconditional Forgiveness by Mary Hayes Grieco, this book echoes these sentiments and then more, concrete steps of which to achieve what I consider to be an "ideal".  Maybe I am not evolved yet to be "unconditional".  But, the willingness to broach the process of forgiveness, I am open to.  I'd learned that it is important for me to let go of the emotional hostility and the pain of the disappointed expectations.  One notion of which I like best is,  "give up the hope for a better past, to give ourselves the gift of a richer present".

Amongst the gifts from friends this week, one tangible gift of which I'd made for myself is this bangle of mixed metals (brass, copper, silver)

"for each twilight, a dawn- R. W. Emerson"
Emotional moments were evident the last couple of days, because of what yesterday and tomorrow means, meant, but it is up to me to decide what it will mean.  I have been wearing the bangle all week.  I recognize the truth and the sheer sanction of these words, a certainty in the literal sense, at the very least.  I am liking this style because it is accommodating for various wrist sizes, yet, it still closes.  Exploring options similar to this style are on the agenda, perhaps "gifts" for other people.